Don't drink from the bottle!

..We were having dinner in the apartment with friends when my mobile rang. It was Dave from Cornwall in his Benidorm apartment. He said "Bob have you been drinking?" "Yes, we are having dinner with our guests" I replied. "OK where is the nearest hospital, is it the clinic?" he asked. "What do you want a hospital for " I said, obviously worried that he was ill. "It's Roy, he has drunk something and thinks he may have poisoned himself" he said with a trace of humour in his voice. "Sorry mate can't help but you could get a taxi to Marina Baixa hospital.

We carried on with the party and the next day we bumped into Roy, Jennifer and Dave. The story came out.

Roy (AKA The Grim Reaper) had a cough and a ticklish throat. He kept his medicine in the kitchen, where the spoons are kept. But Dave was cooking some steaks for dinner which meant blocking the way to the spoon drawer. So Roy, rather than disturb the chef, decided to take a swig from the bottle. Unfortunately, what he actually swigged was Citronella, oops! So Roy was retching an coughing, and generally fearing for his life. So Dave not wishing to waste good fillet steak, had his dinner, then considered the plan to get Roy to medical care.

They rang me, then got up to the clinic,which was closed as I had already predicted. So they got a taxi, to the Benidorm clinic, which is private. They wanted 60 euros or so for the call out doctor,well Roy is from Yorkshire and Dave enjoys a bargain, so they got a taxi to Marina Baixa hospital as I had advised.

There the medics consulted a hospital in Madrid, put Roy on a drip, gave him some medicine and kept him there for a while. The Doctor then said he could go home. "Am I going to die?" said Roy. "Not tonight" was the shrewd Doctors reply.

Having told us the tail, I was taking Roy and Jennifer to the airport. Before we set off I asked Roy to breathe into the car because there was a fly buzzing around.....