Lazy days of summer

...Its been a busy month hence not many blogs. We have had many visitors including my son Ian and his mate Gavin. They returned to the UK yesterday and me and his mother are still feeling a bit down about it. But as we are taking a short trip to the UK soon to sort a certain problem out, we will see him again soon.

The grim reaper (Roy) and his wife Jennifer are back in town, so we have alerted the emergency services, we expect an increase in accidents for a least a month, in fact Roy, if you remember, was the guy who swallowed some citronella, thinking it was cough medicine and ended up at the hospital. Upon his return here, by bus from the airport I hasten to add (Yorkshire folk like to be careful with money) he found some medicinal phials to do something with, but he forgot what he had to use them for and how. So he decided to open one (yes I know I asked why too...but we are talking about Roy here and he is just too curious I suppose). At the top of the phial there is an indent in the glass which suggests if you twist it, it will make a clean break and allow the fluid inside to drain out. So he pinched the glass with fore finger and thumb, twisted and consequently took a major chunk of skin out of his finger. A little bit of self first aid only just stopped Roy from a second trip to the Marina baixa hospital. So as this was day 2 of his holidays I am expecting quite a bit of material before Roy returns to Blighty.

Ian and Gavin were here for 12 days, I picked them up from the airport and they arrived planted their suitcases in the bedroom and then proceeded to act like locusts, eating and drinking everything that fell in their path. As they emerged on to the balcony Ange said as a precaution, be careful not to bounce up and down on the sun loungers as the sun has made them a little brittle and they are likely to crack. Gavin replied as sharp as a knife "Dam and I was just saying to Ian that lets get on the balcony soon so we can bounce up and down on those sun loungers". I just knew it was going to one of those weeks.

At the same time, Pete's sister was here with husband Phil, daughter Katey and friend Emily. The first thing we arranged was a beach party. The Police are not keen on people drinking on the beach, so one has to be a little careful and ensure and beer or wine isn't being openly consumed. So we all had cool boxes and we took a collapsible table. We were joined by Patrick and Neil, and the evening was excellent and we all perhaps had one over the 8, but a good start to the 12 or so days everyone would be here.

On the last evening the boys were here we went into the Old Town and had a Chinese meal. We all had the menu of the day, which was spring rolls for the 2 lads, hot and sour soup for me and a Chinese salad for Ange, main course, Ian had spicy beef, Gavin had chicken, Ange and i had hot and spicy pork, we all had rice, we each had half a bottle of house white wine. and for desert Ange and I had creme caramel, Gavin had ice cream, and Ian a coffee. Total bill 23Euros for the lot of us. You can't beat that.

We left the Chinese and moved on to Tiaras. Tiaras is owned by Steve and Wilf. Steve also works for one of the holiday companies and a meeting and greeting rep. Tiaras is a very small cabaret bar, run by two gay lads but not aimed specifically at a gay market. Wilf does a drag show, but they also have guest artists, and on this particular night Andrea was doing her Cher and Madonna tribute. But Wilf put his frock on and stood at the door touting for passing custom. He had a way with words...."Oh there are a couple coming up here now I will lure them in...." and as they passed "....well we don't need your type in here anyway.." all in the best possible taste of course...

Benidorm is, at the moment light on English tourists and just about to lose the Spanish tourists as the last few spend this last weekend before school starts again, grabbing the last opportunity for some sun. So the bars are quiet, and it does effect the mood of the barmen who spend more time doing nothing which in turn makes their day seem longer. But each day in the late afternoon, Pedro the waiter at the Marina bar, arrives in the Marina 'car' which you can hear way in advance...blue smoke puffing out of the exhaust, and an odd screeching noise as if the fan belt is slipping. He parks the car on the ramp to the next door apartments' car park, and the rest of the waiters come and help him decant the contents. Bottles, carton, packages, and boxes emerge and all disappear into the bar. Pedro then gets back in the car and you can follow the plume of burning oil all the way to the general car park.

Jesus meanwhile has been eating his afternoon meal at the bar, Antonio and Salvador holding the fort whilst he dines. Eventually Jesus emerges replete, with tray, scowl and utters those immortal words "bloody Spaneesh.........they spend nothing"...