Chairs High heels and marbles

...There is a specific phenomenon relating to apartment dwelling. Anyone who has, does or will live in an apartment will discover this phenomenon very quickly.

There you are settling down in bed after a long day (working, relaxing, drinking, socialising - please tick as appropriate) and it starts. First it is the marble dropped on a tiled floor sound, one initial thud, followed by decreasing but rapid smaller thuds, just like a marble being dropped.

The second sound, and it invariably follows this pattern, is of a lady in high heeled shoes yomping around her apartment, and hers seems to be a much much bigger apartment than yours judging by how far she walks in those high heels.

The third sound is the the movement of furniture, not moved by picking up and moving but they slide it...and it screeches.

No matter who you speak to here, every apartment dweller can describe the sound perfectly and consistently. Furthermore, the culprits are almost always with very little exception Spanish people.

These noises do make you form some odd images in your mind. Firstly what is this item they drop which sounds like a bouncing marble? And how come every Spanish family has one and we don't?

Secondly, why do Spanish ladies get out of bed and put their high heel shoes on to walk around an apartment loudly at midnight and beyond? I can't help it but I have a mental image of lady yomping around in high heels whispering to her husband "shall I drop it here?"

Thirdly, is it reasonable to drag furniture around at midnight and beyond, knowing that people are sleeping all around you? And once again I imagine having just dropped the marble, she whispers to her husband "get hold of that chair and drag it over here that should annoy them!"

Sometimes if there are several people above, or beside or below, because its impossible to establish from which direction the noise is coming, the clatter is more reminiscent of a Flamenco dancing class. And whether it is 2 am or 2 pm, they come into the building speaking to each other at the same time at the loudest pitch ever because they can't hear each other over the din they are each making, and they slam every door they walk through.

I don't really know what the marble is, I know what the furniture is!

My wife Ange said to me on Saturday lets go into Carrefour I need some new slippers...we couldn't find any in the entire shop, not in other shops we subsequently tried so I think I now know why they walk round in high heels.....